This lovely image is in honor of tonight’s EFF/CAFE fundraiser at the DNA Lounge featuring the real-life Wil Wheaton taking on Barney the Dinosaur (or an EFF lawyer dressed up like Barney). The stunt is based on an old on-line match-up between the two from years ago… I bet those guys never thought their little joke would get played out in real life, did they?

If you’re reading this, it’s probably already too late for you to go. Thanks to Pat (and a hard-earned $50 donation), I’ve got a VIP pass, Suckaz! Pat is, of course, the EFF’s webmaster, and will be participating as one of Barney’s Lawyers. I anticipate heckling the poor fool the whole way through.

The one thing that weirds me out is that I’ll be hanging out with the other VIPs and the man, Wil Wheaton, himself. I’m not one of the huge Wesley Crusher detractors, but even if I were I wouldn’t hold it against him, since he was just ACTING! But I’m also not sure how to act around celebrities. I tend to want to treat them like normal people, but they’re at a disadvantage because I always know more about them than they know about me…

Anyway, enough with this dalliance. To the DNA Lounge at once!

No new art last night

No new art last night (again). Luckily it was just a promise to myself that I’d draw something every day. Clearly, I need a more realistic goal. I don’t want to kill this momentum by turning it into a chore. :)



All right, this is very vintage me. I used to draw stuff like this every day. Just random characters, whose design was fueled by some combination whimsey, hormones and media mind control.

Drawing the “Leather Babe” character in this image reminded me of a large part of why I stopped drawing regularly years ago… my lame tendency toward the politically correct. I realized at some point that I was drawing these impossible women, which of course meant I was an oppressor of women everywhere. So I stopped drawing one of the most fun things there is in the whole wide world to draw. Well, not any more! Tomorrow: Amazon armies! (Not really)

Not surprisingly the Wacom tablet is getting easier to use every night. I’m starting to whittle it down to the same problems I always have while drawing. I have the advantage of unlimited redos, and as many layers of “blueline” as I need to rough out a drawing… but that can’t make me any better at anatomy or composition, except through dumb luck…

Lou is my favorite of the three freaks, of course.



Okay, this is lame but I felt the need to post something today to make up for my laziness last night. This one happened to be out, and I remember Pat asking me if I could scan it in, so here it is, only five billion beej seconds later.

As previously stated, I love drawing these birdie beasts of burden for a number of reasons. This one was scratched out on the back of the “visual” for that week’s pub trivia at the Mayflower (though I can’t remember which week that was any more). The front side is a photograph of one of those babies that was lost in a well, cruelly augmented with cybernetic implants by some insensitive git.

This also happens to be the one that Kathleen commented on, though I resent the implication that I am a one-dimensional, poultry-obsessed appliance!

Ugh… no new image tonight.

Ugh… no new image tonight. My eyelids are tied to cinderblocks. I’m happy with the 8-day run, though. It’s probably a lifetime record for me. I’m glad I started this weblog. Like any good weblog, it tricks the part of my brain that wants an audience into thinking that one is there, so that I can go places I normally wouldn’t go.

Overall, it’s the cheapest therepy I’ve ever had, and relatively effective too!

Culture Envy

Please forgive this amorphous rant…

I’m torn. I like being me, but I hate having no real culture to call my own. Geek culture is the closest thing I have, but it’s not like I couldn’t be a Geek and have some other interesting background to cling to.

American culture is weird. The melting pot has made it into a deadened shapeless mass. It’s like in printing, where if you mix too many colors, it just comes out as flat puke-gray. That’s how I feel. I’m a whole lot of nothing.

I look at people who were raised Catholic or Jewish, or are from 1st- and 2nd-generation immigrant families — or whatever — I hear lots of complaining, but it helps to define them, and gives them a place to run and hide when the existential weight of it all gets too much.

Sometimes I really wish I could have that feeling rather than feeling like such a blank slate all the time.

I remember one of the last things one of my ex-girlfriends said to me. She said “Don’t worry, you’ll find yourself a little white trash girl and you’ll live out a happy little white trash life!”

Jeez, why couldn’t she have just said I was lousy in bed and that she never really loved me like any halfway decent ex-girlfriend would do!? No need to leave behind the kiss of death like that!

So, anyway…

My only hope, being basically devoid of my own culture, is to leach it off of my friends and maybe someday marry myself into some.



I was talking to Beej a few nights ago about the ActiveBuddy patent, and how incredibly lame it was. I decided to try and comment on it via a comic strip, and this is what I came up with. The art is incredibly rushed, but I think I made the point I was aiming for.

Normally, icon-based would include Bapper as well, but I only needed one character so poor Mtn. Dewd “won” out. He just seemed the natural character to use since he gets dicked around so much in real life. :)

BTW, this is the first online comic strip I have done since 1998, when the last icon-based came out. Woo-hoo!



Today’s image is a confessional piece… it’s me owning up to probably the single most embarassing recurring character from my late-80′s art book.

The Scarlet Seagul was yet another old RPG character of mine from way back, this time for TSR’s Marvel Super Heroes game. The most notable thing about him was his origin, which should sound familiar. Once a wimpy lab geek, “John Hammer” found super powers thrust upon him after being hit with an irradiated bird dropping, transforming him into a bulging Arnold Schwarzeneggar stand-in. He immediately used his newfound strength and agility to fight crime inside the flight suit he had been working on for the science fair. His character sheet lists Hank Pym and Shadowcat as his primary contacts within the Marvel Universe.

But, hey! What’s not to love? SS has it all… a stylized comb/razor-sharp mohawk, wannabe Gatchamon bird helmet, Archangle wings and Tony Stark’s own patented metallic leotard design. And who could resist those comfy-looking talon tabi boots?

I must never allow myself to forget.

I always had a hard time taking RPG characters seriously. My characters were usually pretty ludicrous, and my playing quickly devolved into comic relief, as I found it more and more difficult to keep a straight face. I once played an entire campaign as a drunk swordsman… a good five years before I bothered having a drink in real life!

I wonder why nobody ever asked me back to play any more RPGs..?



This was another quick flight of whimsey. Frendo Preston was an RPG character of mine from way back (>12 years). The RPG was either TSR’s Marvel Super Heroes or Teenagers From Outer Space… but you would swear it was from Paladium’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles based on how I drew the character… Hey, TMNT smacked me over the head in the late 80′s as I dug back in time into the source material for the cartoon. It was bound to influence my style!

Frendo has always been a favorite doodle of mine because I love trenchcoats. Since the dawn of time I’ve always wanted one, but I resolved myself to the idea that I would never find one that fit me (one of the main disadvantages to being 6’7″ is looking like your mother even gave up dressing you). And of course, now it’s all passe to wear trenchcoats so the point is moot.

You’ll notice in this drawing my two biggest weaknesses… guns and shoes. I can’t draw either realistically. But hey, if Rob Liefeld could make a carreer out of Toaster Cannons and pointy little feet, then I can get away with my automatic cigar box!

RIP Chaos! Comics

Here’s some sad news:

[NEWSARAMA] Chaos! Comics Files For Chapter 7 Bankruptcy

I’ve never been a big fan of Chaos! Comics, the publisher of “Lady Death,” “Evil Ernie” and their countless spin-offs, but the publisher always filled its niche well as the place to go for hard-rockin’ big-breasted in-your-face testosterone-flavored comics.

It was a perfect formula! What the smeg went wrong!

It could be that the continuing snob-ification of the comics industry has helped to push Chaos! out of the market. Everybody (or is it just me?) has been flocking to the re-vamped, edgier Marvel books and scouring the Top Shelf and Fantagraphics backlist for our next comics kick… meanwhile, there was Chaos! still plugging away with their bad-girl-with-sword comics that in theory should never have gone out of style…

I hear that their titles fell in quality after their mainstay artist Steven Hughes unexpectedly passed away a couple years ago, which could be another reason for the drop in sales. But I think the loss of the 13-year old boys looking for an over-the-counter Playboy stand-in was a big hit… those kids are now too busy hoarding their money in anticipation of Dave Mirra BMX XXX to shell out $3-4 for a 22-page skin mag.

Which is too bad. I hate to see any comics publisher fall, and Brian Pulido always seemed to me to be an okay guy. There were rumors going around that he was going to sell the company to CrossGen in order to save it, but it turns out that that was never really an option.

Chapter 7 means they are calling it quits and selling everything they can in order to pay off their creditors. I guess this means Lady Death and Purgatory will be able to find a new home, since the niche they fill is now basically empty… they will have to return to disgust me yet again someday.