TITLE The Bastich By Hart
PANEL 1 (BASTICH and FUTURE-STICH sit on a park bench eating a bowl of cherries.) FUTURE-STICH: You know, being from the future provides one with the most incredible insights... Take, for example, this ordinary cherry pit.
PANEL 2 (FUTURE-STICH holds up a cherry pit.) FUTURE-STICH: To you, it matters little whether you spit it to the left or to the right... But to one such as I, who has tasted that which is yet to come, such a decision holds an almost... spiritual significance...
PANEL 3 (FUTURE-STICH holds up his left hand.) FUTURE-STICH: Tell me, do you spit it to the LEFT, where it shall fall on enriched soil and, with time, transform and grow into a strong prosperous tree providing cherries to the hungry...
PANEL 4 (FUTURE-STICH holds up his right hand in a fist.) FUTURE-STICH: Or do you spit it to the RIGHT, pegging a Gothic Sandman-Freak in his pasty-white angst-ridden forehead, embarrassing him in front of his anorexic leather-clad "vampyre" girlfriend?
PANEL 5 (BASTICH prepares to spit out a cherry pit while FUTURE-STICH looks on with his palms held together in a Namaste gesture.) FUTURE-STICH: Let this be your decision.
PANEL 6 (In the foreground, a GOTH MAN sadly rubs his eye while his girlfriend, a GOTH WOMAN, scowls at him. In the background FUTURE-STICH congratulates BASTICH on the park bench.) GOTH MAN: Ouch..! Now my unbearable existence is even MORE rotten! Life sucks! GOTH WOMAN: Don't be such a wuss, Ishmael! FUTURE-STICH: You choose wisely, grasshopper.
CREDITS Bastich (c) 1996 Joshua Adam Hart
Commentary
Multi-stich continues with this mean-spirited meditation on the consequences of our actions.
Obligatory run-down of references:
Honestly, I didn't hate Goths!