TITLE The Bastich By Hart
PANEL 1 (Wide view of a 1985 Chevrolet Camaro driving on the freeway.) CAPTION: Somewhere along 1-5 HACKER-LAD: C'mon, 'Stich, you know the rules! You've gotta pull into the slow lane so this guy can pass! BASTICH: No way, H.L...!
PANEL 2 (Inside, BASTICH is at the wheel while HACKER-LAD is in the passenger seat.) BASTICH: ...I'm well aware of the supposed "rules of the road" and I say that particular rule stinks! Why should I have to pull over just because this wacko wants to break the sound barrier? HACKER-LAD: 'Cause you want to LIVE?!
PANEL 3 (Close-up on BASTICH's glasses with HACKER-LAD peeking from behind.) BASTICH: It's just another example of how our society rewards bullies and keeps us honest geeks down..! HACKER-LAD: (Thinking) Oh dear...
PANEL 4 (BASTICH flashes back to a time when he was sitting at a bench press with a muscular guy tapping his shoulder.) BASTICH: It's like weight training back in high school... the lugs who were already maxed out used to toss me off the bench press and deny me the chance to work on my own puny physique..! JOCK: Step aside, geek!
PANEL 5 (BASTICH defiantly continues driving.) BASTICH: ...and now this maniac is riding my tail and flashing his high beams at me because he wants to go 90mph while I'm going a mere 78mph in a 65mph zone..! Well, I'm not backing down this time! You're gonna have to go around, buddy!
PANEL 6 (HACKER-LAD makes an observation and BASTICH has a moment of humility.) HACKER-LAD: Uh, 'Stich... far be it from me to criticize your mid-eighties Knight-Rider-mobile, but shouldn't that digital speedometer of yours be set for miles per hour instead of kilometers? BASTICH: Oh... I suppose so. Never mind.
CREDITS Bastich (c) 1998 Joshua Adam Hart
Commentary
This is based on a true story.
My 1985 Chevrolet Camaro had a digital speedometer, along with a swiveling robot-head tape deck and a bunch of other "high-tech" electronic features.
One day, I accidentally switched the speedometer to kilometers-per-hour and ended up driving 21mph on a 35pm road. That's not quite as bad as going 48mph in the fast lane of a 65mph freeway, which is what Bastich is doing here.